We’ve had a great weekend catching up with my parents. We had a lot of laughs and played a lot of Mah-jongg. It’s a great game to play with a lot of luck involved. You can strategize as you go, but you are relying on picking up a good tile or your opponent throwing a good one away to help you get out and win.
Time flies when you are having fun and on our games nights, it flew! As the night wore on I was focusing on what I can do and what I was looking for to win. You lose yourself in the game, having lots of laughs along the way. With one of us shouting ‘Mah-jongg’ sometimes before you had a moment to figure out what you are going to do.
In the last hour or so of playing, I was really tired and gave my brain a break from thinking of my next step, at this point my cat was sitting on my lap looking for attention so I would say I wasn’t 100% focussed. At this point, I decided to go with the flow and see what happened. I couldn’t believe it as the wins were coming easier to me at this point. By letting go of winning and doing what I can, it was working out better.
Don’t get me wrong, I know it is a lot about luck as well, so I can’t take all the credit. But I do think, when we are so focused on the need or want to win, we almost block ourselves. Are we perhaps trying too hard to get what we want?
Now I know a game isn’t that big of a deal in the grand scheme of things, so think about your life and what you are striving towards or what you have. Did any of it come easy or did you have to work hard? What happened when you took your foot off the gas or went with the flow instead? Did thing fall into place? I’m not saying working hard is to be avoided, I’m saying perhaps cut yourself some slack and give yourself some leeway.
When looking for love, we’ve heard that you will find it when you stop looking. How true that is will depend on your experience. But when we stop trying so hard and focusing on how things should go or what steps we must take, we begin to react to what comes up in that moment rather than the anticipated steps which we worked on.
When we control our next steps and become so hung up on getting an exact outcome, we fail to look around at the other options or paths that come up. Now, I am certainly not saying this is a bad thing, but if you plan and control all you do, you could miss out on something even better which presents itself.
I know we all want to have a predictable life or know what is coming, but the truth is we really don’t. Do you really want to live a life where there would be no surprises? Life isn’t like that, instead it does throw us curveballs, presenting us with 5 options when you really only want 1, however, what’s to say the one option you want is the best overall? One of the other 4 could be much better, moving you forward in a brighter and bigger way.
I am not saying stop planning or strategizing your next move. What I am saying is to add some flexibility in to your planning – strange to say as it is contradictory. However, look at what you are trying to achieve, make your plans but be open to what comes your way, don’t discount something just because it doesn’t fit with your plans in that moment. Who knows, it could be beneficial to you in the future or indeed open you up to so much more including something you haven’t thought of.
The next time you are planning or making your task list of things you must do or should do to get you to your goal, put in a point that also says to go with the flow. Remind yourself it is ok to step off the bus and hop on another. Your life is huge and can be overwhelming at times, so stop putting so much pressure on yourself to get from A to B by the quickest route. You can’t rush good things, so take your time and enjoy the freedom going with the flow brings.
Thank you for reading. Have a great week and look after you.
Love Emma xx
Wellbeing with Relaxing Lavender 