Character Building Days

I’m sure many of you have days where you just want to go back to bed and start over. It feels as though nothing is going right. Whether you are having issues or someone is causing problems for you, these days can be tough. The kind of day, you want to crawl back into bed and hide under the duvet.

I, like many of you experience these days and just wish there was a way to turn back the clock so you can get a redo on that day. Perhaps changing one thing which would then make the day a great one, instead of the stinker of a day you are instead having.

These are difficult times. The bad days we have are nothing in comparison to those forced to flee their home, families and country. That’s not just a bad day, that’s your worst fears realised.

Bad days come and go, wars may take years to come and go with the affects lasting for many, many years. This is certainly not something you can go back to bed and forget about. It will be a painful journey for all those involved. And for them, I wish I could turn back the clock and give them their life, home and country back.

Leaving your homes, leaving you life behind is unimaginable. Not sure if you will ever see you friends or family again is terrifying. Knowing your home may not be there upon your return is frightening. All your hard work and effort has been taken from you.

There is no bad day that I have had that will ever compare to that. The war in the Ukraine is truly heartbreaking, it has put things in perspective for so many of us. Our lives have not been ruined by war instead someone at work/in our family/at the shops have just annoyed us and made our life difficult for a moment. This can be overcome.

A few weeks ago, when I was at a PT session, I told my trainer about the bad day I had. She said ‘There are no such things as bad days only character building days’. Having looked this quote up, I see it’s amended from the original by Les Brown. ‘Never say you’re having a bad day, say you’re having a character building day’.

This quote really put things into perspective for me. My bad day is nothing in comparison to a real bad day because of war. I am not being displaced, I am merely being inconvenienced for a short period of time. My life will not be ruined because someone has caused me more work. Watching your city being destroyed is a real problem, one which won’t just go away with an hours extra work.

Perspective is everything.

With each new problem or challenge that comes my way each day. I know I can deal with it as it isn’t likely to be life changing or life threatening. It will likely make me stronger and help me to build on who I am and give me the ability to tackle it. I will learn something about myself and start to understand why I change just a day into a bad day.

A character building day gives you the opportunity to look at why you react in a certain way. Take a look from an outsiders perspective and try to view things objectively. Have a think about the following questions:

  • What happened?
  • How much of an impact will it really have on your day?
  • Would an everyday person have reacted this way?
  • Would you normally react in this way or is there something else going on with you?
  • If a person has upset your day, what is going on for them?
  • Do they normally cause you problems?
  • What can you do to ensure it doesn’t affect your entire day?
  • What is the worst thing that can or has happened as a result of this?
  • Is there anything you can do to ensure it doesn’t happen again?
  • Can you deal with the situation or do you need help?

There are likely many more questions you can ask yourself, so answer if they come up. Once you have the answers, you can get an idea on what is really going on and why you are reacting in this way. If anything, it will perhaps make you stop and think before you react in a similar way in the future.

Equally, think about what is challenging you personally and professionally. Will dealing with this situation give you some new skills or help polish up old ones. Are you holding back what you really want to say to stay professional? Use this time to reword what is going on in your head to a more constructive conversation, you’ll thank yourself later. This is character building.

We all dislike it when things don’t go to plan, and although character building days can be tough, we can get through them.

Take care, have a great week and look after you.

Love Emma xx

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